I'm trying to write as soon as I can.
If you have trouble replying to emails, the solution is simply to respond as soon as you finish reading one. If you feel like it's too clingy/desperate/pathetic of you to respond immediately, still write it, but use boomerang. Point is: write immediately.
As I alluded to previously, I'm a control freak when it comes to the way I manage my own life. Therefore, I don't always follow my own rules (like this "write immediately" email rule, although I do find that my "all" is given when I write immediately). It depends on the situation, I suppose.
Anyway, as I said, I am a control freak when it comes to my life. For instance, my gmail (thanks to the help of Cliff) is categorized and utilized exactly the way I need it to be in order to efficiently and seamlessly be on top of things. It's not quite at the optimal efficiency level yet, but again, I don't always follow my own rules, usually because I like to make things difficult by living part-digital and part-analog. Once I started living my gmail life this way, I came to conclusion that I could never be with someone who doesn't know how to use gmail/drive. It's a deal breaker. I don't know how else to say it. And, if you think those people don't exist, then consider yourself privileged to be surrounded by other sophisticated people. I get impressed when people "reply all."
I have thoughts about writing things all the time, but I fail to jot it down to write about later 80% of the time. So if you've ever wondered, that's the cause of the hiatus (if there is one)-- not because I'm too busy.
When I created this blog, I wanted it to be the opposite of my old blog (which I recently made private because I can't bear to look at it anymore. It's defunct anyway). In other words, I wanted it to be mundane. I love reading about what people do on a daily basis. The really humdrum parts of people's lives. I love knowing what people do in the mornings. I love knowing people's rituals. Unfortunately, because no one writes anymore, I learned that people start vlogs like they used to start blogs. I imagine that vlogs are significantly more challenging than blogs in several ways-- you need a camera, an editing program, editing skills, and a video-personality (at least those are the basics). Suddenly, every female thinks they're an expert with their skincare or their fashion (which is quite fascinating how it's become so normalized to believe that people care about how you like to clean your makeup brushes). Anyway, so these vloggers (no longer as niche as it used to be) will occasionally vlog their daily lives-- which is what I like to watch. I don't care about the niche part. I like the mundane part. Of course, it gets complicated. For example, do you really eat salad for every meal? Do you really always have a dinner party to go to? Are all those people your real friends? Et cetera.
What I want to say is that my blog didn't end up becoming a "day in the life" kind of blog that I love. Once upon a time, I was able to do it because it was easy to write about myself, because I was so in-my-own-world. And when you're in your own world, it's easy to be self-absorbed because it's kind of like writing in your own diary: you don't think that anyone would read it.
Not that I think I have a bunch of readers now (and especially not now, as I've come to the conclusion that people don't like reading anymore), but I am aware that readers exist (because I look at the stats). I always prefer not knowing who, but I admit it's nice to receive an email once in a blue moon making known their presence to me, usually triggered by something relevant I wrote (good or bad). (Side note: my fantasy is that ALL my readers are strangers or acquaintances, but not friends).
(I am so mindlessly obsessed with parentheses today, I'm not sure why and am quite bothered).
When I write, I know I'm writing to someone. And I wish I wasn't. I never have a particular person in mind, but there is a mysterious "someone," studying every single word I type, and judging it. So, because of that delusion, I have difficulty in being in my own world to write about my daily life. To this day, my most prized blog is my Denver blog. I truly felt no obligation to write to someone, and I wrote it to a "no one" as opposed to a "someone."
*I am by no means a writer by profession, but I have never written while inebriated, and certainly never ever feel like writing when inebriated (it's a writer thing, to be an alcoholic, if you weren't aware). However, I definitely feel like writing when I drink more coffee than usual. Lately when I have two cups of coffee in one day, I either feel like I'm having a panic attack, or I can't sleep because I'm anxious, or I write like crazy. So yes, I had two cups today.
**M Train by Patti Smith. I haven't read it, and not sure if I will, but I was reading reviews and many of them hilariously mention how obsessively (and disturbingly) Patti Smith writes about coffee. I thought about myself and how annoying I must be.
