I know it's frowned upon to be negative so early into the new year, but you all know how much I love being the recipient of frowns.
Here are some new (and persisting) peeves:
-Clearly looking like you're not listening to someone as they talk
-Actually not listening to someone as they talk by interrupting with a change of subject (yes, I was shocked to learn that people do this!)
-Receiving no acknowledgment or response to something I say (still my number one peeve)
-Being outwardly mean to a stranger/near-stranger for personal reasons
I know this last one is pretty vague and bizarre, but I was led to think about what bothered me about a recent encounter in my journey to find a therapist. After 30 minutes of appalling judgmental statements and belittlement from this social worker whom I was considering to hire to confide all my vulnerable self to, I still stayed for the whole session hoping that I just caught her in a frenzied start (although, if this happens to you, no matter your therapist's mood or personal distress, you should not feel like you have to defend your being). And defending myself was what I was doing for 30 minutes. Still, I sniffled in her presence and still, she nonchalantly waved the Kleenex box in my general direction, showing, at the very least, that she was acknowledging that I'm actually her patient and not her younger, regretful self, or her twentysomething daughter, or a Korean person she knows that she happens to hate.
I knew our laughs and our few moments of agreement were fake. I did it because I think I'm generally too nice to people I don't know.
I got home and cancelled the next appointment we just made, as well as any future recurring appointment. I texted her in the morning with a short, matter-of-fact statement, pretty much saying "You're fired." And then I thought, I hope she feels awful about herself. Which is about the meanest thing to say if you think about it.
