Tell me, what is the point of a close, heterosexual, platonic relationship?
I want to reiterate the fact that straight men and women have no hope for platonic relationships.
I think about all the times I've had super close guy friends, and realized there was always a Dead End. If there wasn't, it was because we either haven't accepted the fact that one person or both had developed unexpected feelings, or because we were simply ignoring such emotions. Thus, the relationship was no longer platonic; it just wasn't discussed--which doesn't make it okay. When the friendship hits a wall, it means you need to make a decision: back off or move forward.
Now, don't get me wrong. Backing off doesn't mean you can't speak to the person ever again. It just means you can't be as close as you were or want to be without going back to Square One AKA Dead End. Moving forward obviously means you can finally give in to all the rumors and years and years of assumptions that the people around you made and, well, they were right.
Don't you feel silly now?
Do take note that it is not always the case that feelings are mutual between these "platonic" friends. One person falls for the other, and the other just sees that person as an older brother, etc. Very common. But my point isn't that all "platonic" male-female friendships are going to end in romantic relationships. My point is that it's an unfruitful friendship if it doesn't intentionally lead to something more.
How many couples do you know became couples precisely because they had experienced the Dead End? Or how many straight male-female friendships have you seen mysteriously dissipate?
So again, I want to ask, what is the purpose of a close, heterosexual, platonic relationship between men and women?
If the point is not to reach a monogamous relationship, then what is it there for? It's not fruitful- it's just NOT!!!
Obviously if you're just friends with the opposite sex, there's no harm. I have guy friends myself. You just can't be "best friends," or even talking on a consistent, daily basis without getting to the Dead End. My question for those who disagree (especially if you're in a relationship and have a close opposite sex "friend"): why are you talking to that person so much? Because you guys get along? Because he/she is unique? He/she understands you? Because you guys have history? Because you guys have the same interests? Yes, yes, yes, and yes? Then my final question, why aren't you in a relationship with that person?
To add a little cheekiness to all this, I personally live in a strange circumstance regarding this issue. My best friend is a guy, and I answer "yes" to the questions above. In a straight world, he liked me. In this now-gay world, he doesn't (and I have never. Just saying). Like I said, it doesn't have to be mutual. That's why a lot of guys get in situations where they feel they have been "led on" by girls who mistakenly took their relationship as a purely platonic one. And no, I'm nowhere near in love with my gay friend. I hate to be one of those people that are so gung-ho about a topic and then they create an exception for themselves, but yeah, that's me and I'm doing it right now. If you can illegitimize my exception, please email me and we'll talk.
I say this from multiple experiences that were equally (on both our parts) foolish. Someone gets hurt, at least one. I guess this makes me more passionate and defensive for anyone who blindly falls into the trap.
I'm usually not very aggressive and single-minded, but I'm just going to say how I feel: anyone who doesn't agree with me is just in denial... for whatever reason.
